xdrowningdstinyx on Xanga

xdrowningdstinyx
read my profile sign my guestbook Name: KeL Birthday: 8/3/1986 Gender: Female Interests: musssicccc, my friends, fashion Expertise: um I'll get back to you on that. Occupation: Government Message: message meEmail: email me Website: visit my website AIM: xdrowningdstinyx Member Since: 10/20/2004

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Posting Calendar

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Thursday, September 06, 2007

Yes, I'm laughing at you...

I don't post a lot, I know, but I just read the funniest and most hypocrtical post ever posted on this person's xanga.

My God. You're a Christian or not, make up your mind.

I can't even say anything about what I'm laughing at....but you who still post on xanga, I'm laughing my butt off at you.

I guess I'm a close-minded Southern Baptist. Whaddya know.

bahahahahahahaha.

9:29 PM - 24 views - add eprops - add comments - email it

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

For my family; particularly my cousins' immediately family. I don't know how many of you know Ron and Wendi Baxter, but their father was found dead yesterday in his home.

This was a shock, to say the least. I saw the family Monday night at a banquet and Ronald Sr. looked fine. We were excited because Ron will be valedictorian at Central this year. That was actually the last thing he talked to his father about, so at least he got to tell him that.

Just pray for them; I know they're taking it pretty hard. If anybody wants funeral/visitation information, let me know.

11:12 AM - 18 views - add eprops - add comments - email it

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Beating The Dead Horse

So I don't want to make a long, drawn-out blog about the VTech shootings; the media has analyzed and attempted to decipher the guy's motives way too many times.

All I'll say is this. Virginia Tech, we're ALL supporting you through thoughts, prayers, and hopes you will get through this excruciatingly hard time. I for one can't imagine what you're going through, so I won't say "I understand", but I will say the school is in my thoughts everyday.

Like the banners say, right now, "We're All Hokies."

4:56 PM - 17 views - add eprops - add comments - email it

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I've had a lot of things come back to haunt me lately. There's a guy who's back in town who I have quite a lot of history with; I saw him in front of the chamber this morning and almost had a heart attack. I've had people bring up things that I wanted to forget, and I've had people who don't know where I've come from critisize where I am and where I'm going.

Most of my true friends know my history; we all have our problems, mine aren't any worse or any better than Lizi's, or Mere's, or Josh's.

To sum it up quickly, it was basically: Auburn was bad, I was diagnosed with severe depression/anxiety disorder, refused to take medicine, got really wild, started cutting, quit going to class, attempted suicide, got put back on medication, quit taking it, failed 4/5 of my classes, came extremely close to attempting suicide again, moved back home, did ok for a while, started doing drugs again, got caught, and fixed myself.

As of now, I'm off all my medications, been released by all the doctors, and I've been clean for a year.

I write all this because I've finally realized lately how hard it is to let go of the past one hundred percent. I can say I've let go; I can say "oh, this-and-this is in my history", but is it really? We all have scars, literally and metaphorically, that we can relate back to a specific point in our lives, and describe the past situation with as much emotion as we would have used the day after. Some feelings and memories are harder to surpress than others.

And honestly, I don't know if we should totally hide our pasts from the world. Of course there are private issues that should be kept close to our hearts and not shared, but for the most part, some people are determined to be entirely different people than they were five, ten, fifteen years ago. I'm not saying you won't change as a person, but those past experiences are what shaped you. They're what made you confident, shy, scared, strong, whatever. It's your trials, your experiences, your history in general that brings out your characteristics. You should be proud your survived through your past.

When I wrote what my past consisted of, there were things I left out (both for my protection and other people). Those people might read this, they might not, but they can pinpoint an exact place and say, "That's when I knew her," or "That's where I came in". My best friend from Auburn doesn't know some of the things on that list. But for the most part, every one of those experiences has helped me in another situation. I'm a different person now; a better person.

I'm glad I went through what I did. I'm not ashamed of it, and I'm not going to hide it. It's helped me mature and realize who I am. Maybe we all should consider our pasts a little bit more, and think about using the memories to our advantage instead of hiding them inside.

9:08 AM - 32 views - 2 eprops - 1 comment - email it

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Brief Update on Anything I can Think of...

Final Grades: 4 A's, 1 B. I'm thrilled beyond belief. :)
I still love God. Yep. He's pretty amazing, if I do say so myself. I've noticed a change in not only the way I live, but the way I relate to people. There's some apologizing I have to do, and I'm going to get to it ASAP. True, the main person I've had the biggest problem with is NOT getting an apology, but that's b/c I've already tried and he's a loser. Anyway, I'm glad God always takes me back, even though I mess up so much.
It's almost 2007!!!! (yay, I think.)
I have amazing friends...but of course we knew that.
I'm still refusing to date; I get too emotionally attached, and it's not good for me to become attached to something that (a) at this point, will most likely end in a few months; and (b) will probably take my focus away from God instead of encouraging it. Hey, I'm just basing this on 99% of the guys I know

I think that's it. I'm just not so interested in this Xanga anymore, but I feel a need to keep it alive just so I won't have to transfer my subscriptions to a new one. Eh.

10:55 AM - 2 views - add eprops - add comments - email it

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Yes, I'm laughing at you...

Please Pray

Beating The Dead Horse

Brief Update on Anything I can Think of...